Wednesday, September 24, 2014

Rosh Hashanah and the second day of autumn

This morning as I drink my coffee, I am reading about the beginning of the Jewish holiday Rosh Hashanah. I'm not of the Jewish faith but I love the idea of "casting off", walking to flowing water, such as a creek or river, on the afternoon of the first day and emptying our pockets into the river, symbolically casting off our sins. Small pieces of bread are commonly put in the pocket to cast off. Today, the second day of autumn, I have much to cast off.

Mostly, I am casting off the burden of guilt over my actions. I am trying to make things right with people I have hurt with my behavior. Most are not holding grudges but are only happy to see me in a better place. That is good. I am casting off fear that I can't manage the troubles in my life without numbing. Of course, I can and it's so much more pleasant that way. Being fully alive and present is the alternative. I am casting off those with harsh judgment and criticism. I am not living their lives...I am living mine. I am casting off shame. Ah, what a wonderful feeling. I am casting off shame.

A friend of mine lost her husband two years ago. They didn't have a funeral or service of any kind because that's what he wanted. This year, they are starting a tradition of paying it forward in his honor on September 26, the anniversary of his death. What a nice way to remember a man who had such a talent for finding those in need of a hand up. I have a plan for things I might do and a plan to be places where I can be alert for ways to help. What a grand idea.

Yesterday I finished my bathroom painting project. I did the prep work, a friend came to help with the final painting, and then we went out for dinner. I had an O'Doul's non-alcoholic beer which really did the job of quenching my thirst. Funny how I have an aversion to that numb and out-of-control feeling I used to crave. I like being present for every minute of my wild and precious life!

I have a new coat of paint in the bathroom, everything has been cleaned, there is a new shower curtain waiting to go up, the mirror has been painted...all signs of renewal. My friend, Deb, says, "Out with the old and in with the new!" Happy Rosh Hashanah, Deb!

I have nothing on my written agenda for today. I am going to clean and reassemble the bathroom after its face-lift but I am going to relax and enjoy the beautiful fall day. I got school pictures of my grandbabies this week and they are growing up so fast. How did it happen? Someone said when kids are small, the days are long but the time is short. Very true.

I have a bag full of apples to be turned into pie and sauce and cake. I love the smell of baking apples. Baking apples is not work but joy.

Wishing you all a wonderful second day of fall (or spring if you are in the other hemisphere!) and much joy in your lives. The struggles are important but they can't be all there is. Light and love. 

And cast off something you don't need today, will you?

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