Tuesday, June 04, 2013

trying to get my shit in one seabag

I haven't written in a few days again. No particular reason, in fact, I was surprised it had been so long. Maybe not much is going on, maybe I don't take the time to observe, maybe I'm tired of and tired from this long haul of treatment.

I keep meaning to get back on my horse but it doesn't seem to happen. Every day I think I will do something...go for a walk, do some shopping, make some bars, clean off my desk...and every day slips by and I don't do it.

I whined when I saw the medical folks yesterday. My skin hurts in the places where they shoot the laser beams. There are four spots that are red and bumpy. They sympathized and gave me a bag of sample lotion as a parting gift.

I have seven treatments to go. Six after today. Every day I am so tempted to send Gus in my place. I have just about run out of patience with this whole ball of wax.

I sit and play endless games on my iPad. Endless games of Word Solitaire, Solitaire, and Mah Jongg. In the middle of the night, I made a word worth 168 points. I can't remember what it was but I was tempted to wake Regis to show him.

I haven't planted any flowers yet but I did drag my pots to the patio. That's a start. Yesterday, I raked and hoed a little bit before Jill picked me up for radiation. We had a good visit and breakfast at Guenther's.

Whiney, whiney, whiney me. I checked the spelling and it can go either way...whiney or whiny. Good to have alternate spellings for a word I use so much.

Gus got his summer haircut yesterday and he's looking dapper but poodley. Long hair is just too hard to take care of when he's running in the dirt every day. Terry always writes a note on the slip...Gus was a very good boy. He also has an ear infection.

I don't know why this is a lesson I have to keep learning. Once I start writing my whining down, it doesn't seem so bad. I'm back from the edge of the abyss. Ah....

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