Tuesday, January 08, 2013

spam, sleep, symptoms, and cranky: WARNING


Cranky pretty much sums it up.

I was awake until 2 o'clock last night, moved to the couch, fell asleep until 5 o'clock. I woke up at one point with my head wedged between the pillow and the back of the couch and thought what the hell where am I. I spent more time trying to sleep than I did sleeping.

I have to change the comment setting on my blog again. Sorry to make it more complicated, Mom, but I am getting too much spam from robots promoting Pakistani baseball, Viagra, or knock-off Gucci purses. Do they really think anybody reads that shit? Half the time it's in a language I can't even read. It's really irritating me this morning. See paragraph above.

The other day, I complained about not experiencing any symptoms from my chemo treatments and wondered if they were slipping me bags of plain saline. Ah, yeah. Be careful what you wish for, I'd say. I have been experiencing symptoms.

I called the research nurse yesterday because the top of my head itches like a bitch, my eyes look like I've been on an opium bender, and my skin is drying up. She is always very interested in my symptoms and has good ideas. I bought a cool mist humidifier, I massaged the top of my head, I bought saline drops.

I had to pay 14 dollars for a bottle of plain saline drops for my eyes. Seriously. There are tons of drops on the shelf for two dollars a bottle but the plain saline with no chemicals they keep behind the counter and it costs seven times as much. How does this make sense? That math was hard for me, by the way.

Last night I was fascinated when I could grab a fingerful of the tiny stubble and it would come out in my hand. I stared at it by the light of my Kindle. Tiny pinches of hair in the eerie light of an electronic device.

I had to get out of my chair just now and walk into the other room to shut off my favorite radio station. It's Elvis's birthday today so that's the musical agenda. I can't stand Elvis on a good day.

Yes, some good things have happened in the last few days, but just let me get this out of my system.

I went to my new exercise class yesterday. It's like a fitness center for the aged...lots of pink hair, walkers, and oxygen tanks. My new friend, Allen, told me that he noticed right away that I could tie my shoe laces in the middle. He said old fat guys with big bellies like himself tie them on the side or not at all.

I used to go to a gym where the women ran marathons. Have I crossed over to the other side?

My volume knob hurts again today. I suppose it was the stretching I did yesterday. Even Tiffany, who is fascinated with all things weirdly medical thinks the port is gross. It's my new alien baby.

I think that's all the complaining I want to do today. Here is my list of things going well:

  • I like my new exercise class. The trainers are very smart and helpful and the people there are friendly. I got to pick the radio station yesterday. (Oh, my God. This sounds like playing Cootie for bananas in the nursing home, Jane.)
  • Regis took my long grocery list and went to the store this morning before it was even light. I hate going to the grocery store. I wander around and buy weird things then get home and wonder what to do with them.
  • I have two things coming in the mail. A package of homemade lefse from Deb and Larry in Arizona. Don't be staking out my mailbox for the next few days because I don't leave the house!
  • The other is a dress from Betty and Tom in Texas. Maybe it will be a wild colored south of the border looking dress and I can wear it to my next chemo appointment. I like to go for the outrageous attire when I go there...no blue gowns or sweat pants.
  • I had to confess to the pharmacist at Walgreen's that I lost the syringes for my Vitamin B. She was very nice about it and replaced them without making me feel like a junkie. I picked up the lost ones the day of my first chemo appointment, then it was Christmas. Who knows where they went? They disappeared in the flotsam and jetsam of daily living.
That's enough for today. Things will always get better.

1 comment:

Caroline said...

Some cures for you:

- Tell your doctors you have problems sleeping and they should be able to give you something to help.
- Go to the post part of blogger and put the spam filters to work.

In the meantime, dream of the beach on a perfect summer day.