Monday, December 06, 2010

this is my favorite time to write

I came home very late from school, when it was almost dark, and I'm tired. We made dinner and I cleaned up that mess and the apples in the dehydrator. Now, I sit in front of the fireplace with a glass of pinot grigio. I have nothing to say but it's my favorite time to write.

When I taught writing classes, I always said that the days you least feel like writing are the most important ones to write. Things percolate around in your brain and eventually (most days) something travels through your brain, down your arm, and out the end of your fingers. You don't know what you're thinking until you write it.

My work has been stressful this year. I feel grossly incompetent in almost every area and I don't know why but it's painful. I think it's because I travel so much and I'm an inch deep and a mile wide. That's a bad analogy but what I mean is that I know a tiny bit about a lot of things but I don't know anything very well. I'm not anywhere long enough to know the whole scoop. It's wearying. Words swirl around my head like black birds in the fall. I can't identify acronyms anymore. Curriculum studies? PLCs? Selling the orange peel? Am I mixing metaphors? I've come a long way from teaching writing and I'm quite sure I'm not happy about it. I guess that's life and it sucks.

I think I finally have enough lights up to chase the zombies away. I have lights everywhere. I filled a glass cookie jar with lights and ran the cord out between the jar and the lid. I filled a giant Coke bottle up with lights and plopped the flowers in on top of them. I have lights everywhere as I think you should in the winter.

We had nine hours of daylight today which is barely enough time to get to work and home in the light. It's only going to get worse, folks, so hang on to your flashlights and your wine bottles.

We're having each of our kids over for a night's dinner before Christmas. The holidays get so rushed and we hardly have time to visit when they're all here at the same time. I am not promising anything fancy and maybe some of them will get a pizza delivery but it will be nice. One of them wanted to know what the deal was with the separate dinners. I told Regis he should have said we're giving them all big checks and we don't want them comparing amounts on Christmas Eve. Holding up the joke sign. Hahahahaha!!!!

My skin already feels like I've done an ultra marathon across Death Valley. I'm reading a book about a guy who did that and he's insane. Certifiable. Nothing courageous about it. Just plain nuts.

Regis made a trip to the grocery store with a long list today. We hadn't bought groceries since before Thanksgiving and our refrigerator showed it. No eggs. No bread. No milk. Good to have a well-stocked larder again. He also went to Aldi's which we kind of like when we don't see a guy with the world's worst mullet eating cold wieners out of the trunk of his car. We love their coffee and their dark European chocolate and their dried fruit. We can make a meal out of wine, dried fruit, nuts, and dark chocolate. That's all the food groups, right?

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