Sunday, December 16, 2007

Flashlights and Wildlife

I encouraged Regis to locate his flashlights and line them up for a blog photo. He took a picture, then remembered another flashlight, then took another picture. It got to be quite a project. I think the only one missing in this photo is the one with the multi-directional head that you can use underwater. The tall one in the back row in a mag light that you can grip near the light then use it to whack a bad guy who might be approaching. A very useful tool in the modern rural home. He realized as he perused his complete collection, that he is woefully short of flashlights. A guy can never have too many. Apparently. (Christmas present hint!)

We had a wildlife bonanza in our front yard today. This is the male cardinal. The picture was taken through the front window which is clean as a whistle and there is no reason for the foggy condition of this print. Must be in the camera.
The squirrel really likes the corn cob although he'll throw it to the ground and eat sunflower seeds, too.

The male cardinal was at the feeder, too, but we didn't get a good picture of him. They're awfully skittish.

This fat guy really likes the feeder.

Regis is making a prime rib roast and Yorkshire pudding for dinner. He's a great cook and I don't know why he kept it such a secret for so long. He made me a great omelet for breakfast this morning. I could get used to this pretty quickly.

The holidays are hard on people. I've probably been in tears five times's a combination of no sleep, hormones, over-stimulation, lack of preparation, mess, and nerves. Tiffany told me she isn't coming home for Christmas, but actually she is leaving the night of the 23rd after work so she is deliberately leaving before Christmas. There is a difference between: I can't come home and I won't be home. It's breaking my heart and I'm sorry if you thought my blog was all laughs. Life isn't like that.

Speaking of holidays, I have a CD on with a song by Andy Williams. Remember how he used to have those smarmy Christmas specials in the 60's with the whole family around the fireplace and they all had matching sweaters (there's my Martha Stewart fantasy again...) and then his little French wife Claudine had an affair with the skier Spyder Sabich and Claudine shot Spider with a gun and killed him? That's how life can be. Brutal.

Regis, internet sleuth that he is, snuffed out this story: Olympic skier/playboy Spyder Sabich entered the bathroom of his Aspen home to take a shower after a day of skiing. His live-in girlfriend, French singer/actress Claudine Longet, estranged wife of entertainer Andy Williams, asked Sabich how to use his .22-caliber pistol. Longet claims that Sabich postponed his shower to demonstrate use of the weapon, which accidentally discharged a couple of rounds into him. Throughout the trial and ensuing media circus, Williams stood steadfastly by his lovely wife. It's a shame that the guy who gave us Born Free and Moon River was such a cuckold.

Anyway, the cops bungled the investigation, and lovely Claudine spent 30 days incarcerated in a tastefully appointed apartment set up just for her in the Aspen courthouse. The happy ending to this sordid tale is that Williams eventually came to his senses, divorced Longet, remarried, and has assumed his rightful place as one of the all-time legends of American entertainment. What makes Williams so totally cool is that he was an excellent skier. Longet lives in obscurity. Sabich did not survive the shower.

You would postpone a shower (I wonder what state of undress he was in at the time) to show your wife how to use a pistol and then she accidentally pumps two shots into your naked torso. Uh huh. A likely story. I also wonder why this story continues to have legs almost forty years after it happened. Kooks like me, I suppose.

On a slightly different note, I have a new glass-top stove. I've gotten freaky about how clean it is, which isn't characteristic of me at all. I bought a special cleaner, then I bought a special cleaning kit made my Dow or somebody. I polish it, I make sure all the spills are cleaned up, I use Windex to shine it, I don't keep anything on it when I'm not cooking. When Regis cooks, I peer around his shoulder to see what kind of pan he has and if he's shaking it. I even read on the internet about how to remove stains. It's very weird and scary.

Ok, before someone moves to have me before a commitment judge. My fur is still messed up but I'm not nuts. Adios for the night.

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