Monday, August 06, 2007

Almost normal

What a great goat face.

I'm feeling much better today. I had to go to an administrative retreat this morning to report on a couple of projects I've been working on and I was a little worried about the morphine hangover. I stopped at school to make some copies. As soon as I turned the car off, I remembered that because of the sludge problem, I should let it run for a few minutes. I put it in neutral and let it run while I gathered up my stuff, shut it off and went into the building. After a while, I went back to the office to make some copies and saw my car sitting across the parking lot in a grove of pine trees. Apparently, I had neglected to put it in gear and it backed itself up right to the edge of the woods. I had inches to spare. This is not knowledge that my husband needs to have right now today so if you happen to run into him, this is not for conversation.

Another little piece of irony that I forgot to mention a few days ago is that when my car was in for repair, Arvin said it had oil sludge build-up. That same day we found out that Regis had a gall stone which is actually cholesterol sludge in your gall bladder. I thought it was amusing that they both suffered from the same thing. Arvin said it might cost more to fix Regis' sludge than the Beetle's but it didn't.

I took a big envelope down to the PO today. Howard, the Fritsch patriarch in Pennsylvania, was interested in the bridge collapse so Regis gathered up the Sunday Trib articles and put them in an envelope for him. I waited for Dawn at the PO to ask me if the envelope contained anything liquid, fragile, perishable, potentially hazardous or dangerous...and I replied, "Just pictures of the President." I thought it was a pretty good line and laughed like crazy. There was some guy behind the counter who gave me a dirty look. Maybe he likes the Current Occupant. When I told the story at home, Regis and Tiffany didn't think it was quite as funny as I did either.

I hate this time of year. My garden looks like hell, the lawn looks like hell, I hate going to work, and it's gloomy. All we have to look forward to in the next few weeks is the tractor pull and a corn dog at the county fair. Now that's funny. And speaking of corn dogs...

Last week Regis and I met with a representative of the group of old people who sponsor the safe driving classes because we're going to volunteer to teach. (How pitiful...) I won't mention the group because you know my paranoia about being googled. Some well-intentioned person puts in the name of that group and up pops my blog with my sarcastic remarks about the elderly safe driving class. I'd feel terrible. Well anyway the guy said we could volunteer to sit in the booth at the state fair (for a free motel room) and talk about safe driving if we were so inclined. I said I hate the state fair and think of it as hell with corn dogs. He didn't think that was a bit funny. Seems like most people don't think I'm nearly as funny as I do myself.


Anonymous said...

I laughed at your jokes, Teresa...does that count?! The laughter was even out loud. That MUST count :)

Those other people just need to lighten up.


Teresa Saum said...

Oh yes, that counts, Annie. Thanks for telling me. Really, didn't you love the post office story?

Jill said...

I laughed at them, too, if you're keeping track. By the way, you'll have to let me know via email or secret code what the name of the safe driving group is so Larry and I can take it from you and Regis. Will you bring cookies?

Teresa Saum said...

I'm not exactly keeping track but I do make a check by your name if you tell me you laughed. I appreciate a good audience. : )

Jill said...

Well then, you can only imagine how I laughed at the anniversary photo you posted of Larry and me!