I got home from work (some fresh kind of hell today) about noon and went right out to work in the garden. I weeded the whole mess, watered a few things, and buried two dead birds. I found the dove that expired on the driveway a week ago, and the robin who kamikazied into the bushes was getting mummifed so he needed a burial, too. When I picked him up with the shovel, his leg fell off. I needed that today. When I got done with that, I went to the basement and started vacuuming cobwebs and spider stuff. At 7 o'clock I had a beer, took a bath, then burst into tears. Just too much I guess.
I know people who talk about drawing orioles to their yards with grape jelly. We're on our second feeder thing and so far, all we've managed to attract is moths and ants. Sunday I threw a feeder in the trash that must have drowned at least a dozen moths in grape jelly. It was disgusting. I also can't seem to attract hummingbirds. They come to the lilies right below the feeder but they turn up their pointy little noses at the red hummingbird food. Maybe they can just fend for themselves then.
We sat in the yard for a while tonight and watched our neighbor try to set up a timed sprinkler system. They're going to Alaska for 8 days and they think this will keep their lawn and shrubs fortified while they're gone. Funny thought. She and Regis had a good time talking about how Alaska might have changed in the last 30 years since he was there. I bet she went home with "old fart" in the thought bubble over her head. Don't tell him I said that.
I finished Straight Man and started one of David Sedaris' books. He's funny but not as funny as Bill Bryson or Garrison Keillor. Maybe I have a stunted sense of humor. I don't laugh out loud at things that are funny, or at least that claim to be funny on the book jacket. I've laughed so hard at Bill Bryson that I have to get up off the couch so I don't choke. Now that's funny. I don't usually think movies are funny either come to think of it. I laughed at All of Me with Steve Martin and at one part in Meet the Fokkers. And I'm not fond of jokes. I have a couple favorites (the dyslexic agnostic insomniac, for one) but most don't make me laugh. I guess it's true...stunted sense of humor.