Thursday, August 17, 2017

waking up

In the breach between sleep and awake, I wrote a great blog post with a catchy title. By the time I was fully awake, it had disappeared. So much for mental composition.

I'm using my laptop while I watch the news about possible nuclear war, the blundering fool in the white house, people in positions of power and authority who are doing things I swear my eight-year old grandsons would know better than to do, and the heartbreaking funeral for the young woman killed in Charlottesville. Someone said we should stop saying it's unbelievable because, really, by this point it is all very believable. Which is, itself, unbelievable.

On a happy note, Easton is pure joy. In the last few weeks, he has learned to laugh aloud, sit up by himself, eat Cheerios, and shake his head no. I've noticed that over time, his awareness has grown. He wants to know who's in the room. he pays attention to the pets, and he is not content to just sit passively on my lap. He's ready to go!

Wind today. Not my favorite weather event. Yesterday I was sitting at the picnic table with Easton when it started to rain. I checked the weather on my phone...and we're in a tornado warning. Tornadoes touched down ten miles north of us in several directions. What the hell. What happened to all those alerts and warnings that we're supposed to get? Tornadoes must have snuck up on the weather folks.

I'm on my way to the gym even though my shoulder is touchy. This session's workouts are really tough but I can tell I'm getting stronger. I haven't had joint pain in months and my flexibility and balance have improved. Money spent on Gunnar reaps great rewards. Maybe I'll enter one of those old lady weight lifting competitions. Ha!

Time to finish the coffee and get moving. See ya.

Wednesday, August 16, 2017

life gets busy

I think I am busier now than when I worked full time. Then, I had a job I went to from 8-4:00 and I didn't do all this running around. All of it is good and most of it is fun. Being able to spend so much time with Easton as he grows from babyhood has been a wonderful gift and I'm so grateful. Friday, I had these things to do: something at 9, 10, 11, 2:30, 4:30. Whew.

I'm obsessed with the news, too, and I can't apologize for that. The world is a different place than I thought it was two years ago and I am afraid. I have to check every morning to see if we have entered into a war with another nuclear power. I have to watch as the person who lives in the WH switches quickly from talking about white supremacy to shilling for his winery. He is unhinged.

I'm going to apply for a PT job at one of the places where I volunteer. It's a lovely place to work, it's very flexible, and I would get to hang out with artistic type folks. Speaking of...Regis was at the dog park the other day and this dude said, "If dogs get a lot of vaccinations, do they get artistic like kids do?" Wow. How to answer that.

We had friends over for dinner last night. Regis was mortified at the quality of his ribs but I think the problem is that we bought St. Louis style instead of babyback. Ah, well. When I offered to send some ribs home with them, there was a moment of awkward silence while they thought of a reason to say no. There's a clue.

I can tell I'm getting back to my blogging habit. I spend a lot of time during the day composing mentally and I'm watchful for things that might be blog worthy. I read yesterday that an author said being a novelist ruins you for living in the moment because you are constantly thinking of how to write about whatever is happening. Not equating myself to a famous novelist, of course. Eye roll.

Moving on into the day. Going to write a letter of interest and a resume for my new job prospect.

Thursday, August 10, 2017

thursday stuff

Regis and I have cut back severely on the amount of news we watch.  We realized we were watching the same horrific shit show hashed over each hour. Nothing really changes except the talking heads. We have a couple of favorites and we'll stick to those programs.

I told Regis I thought I could watch Game of Thrones since I feel like a cultural illiterate sometimes. After reading about it (fantasy?) and talking to Tiffany about the sexual violence, I have given it more thought and I will abstain. I have a very low threshold for horror.

I've been busy already this morning. I cleaned the litter box, filled the hummingbird feeders, put together an order for school clothes for Elliot, got two packages ready to mail, printed the address labels, and here I am, writing on my blog.

Mom and I are both working on blog posts about the reunion. I have some thoughts about family trees that I'm pondering. And of course, this led me down the rabbit hole of I am the scourge of a program like this which, I imagine, thrives on accuracy. I am more interested in the stories of people than I am the DNA so if someone has a good picture and they seem linked, what the hell, they're on my family tree.

Moving on to other errands.

Monday, August 07, 2017

the road before me

Since I made the commitment to make writing a habit again, I have been scanning through pictures. Sometimes the pictures provoke a memory, sometimes they suggest a theme. This morning, I noticed that I have a lot of pictures of paths. I don't know if that's completely random or a subconscious yearning.

I'm not a traveling person. A three-hour trip in the car is about all I can manage. Any more than that and I get cranky. I love being places, it's the journey that gets tedious.

Those are my only deep thoughts about the pathways of my life.

One other funny thing these pictures illustrate is that one time I learned how to label my photos with my name and the date. My intellectual property, you know. The problem is that now I can't remember how I did it so they will forever be labelled with 2016. I guess I could look it up.

End of summer. We realized this morning that we should probably move our Labor Day family party up a week or so. We have two daughters-in-law who are going to celebrate a real Labor Day soon. I'm going school shopping with Elliot this afternoon. Another sign of fall. Friends are talking about returning to the South where they go to get away from winter. It's another loss for me. Sigh.

Sunday, August 06, 2017

autumn and loss

In fall and winter, I always feel the weight of loss more than other times of the year. The days are shrinking...last night it was past twilight at 8:30 and this morning it was dark until after 6. I'm already missing the light.

I have lost friends. A teaching friend, an internet breast cancer friend, the mom of my oldest friend. Why, when the leaves on the apple tree start to yellow and drift down, do I think of them more often?

Summer has gone fast and I have done what I usually do. I have made plans and I have had good intentions but I'm not so good at at the follow-through. I have learned to forgive myself in advance. I tell myself: Yeah that's a good idea but I probably won't get it done so let it go. Some things I am able to advance past the planning stage. I have two packages on the table almost ready to mail. This is a multi-step project at which I suck.

I have been able to spend a lot of time with my newest grandbaby, something for which I will always be grateful. I was working when the others were born so their babyhood seemed to fly past and was only marked by holidays and birthdays. Being there to see Easton learn to sit, learn to grab cereal off the tray with his tiny fingers, learn to blow bubbles with his mouth...those have been precious moments.

I have been a slacker when it comes to writing the last year or so. I have good intentions but if you look at my archive, I have periods where I am more prolific than I have been lately. I know what the reasons are: Trying to write for an audience, trying to write about everything, and loss of habit.

Four things have happened in the last few days to encourage me to start writing more. Jill encouraged me to print some of my posts, Marne at River Rock complimented the writing I did while I worked there, Kathryn complimented my Facebook posts, and a very kind stranger took the time to write a comment on the post from last week.

So, here I am at the beginning of my habit again. I am in my cozy office, I lit a candle, the curtains are open so I can see the gray August sky, and I have let the things I need to do be wiped from my slate for now. There is time for that later.

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

midsummer evening and promises to myself

It's hot and humid. The dog days of summer. Storms possible tonight right about bedtime which means the weather alert will be screaming and Regis will be watching for lightening. As hot as it is, I like to sit on the patio for a while every evening. It's good for my mental health to be outside...the Japanese call it forest bathing. You can look it up.

I've promised myself that starting in September, I will be outside for an hour every day no matter the weather. Through the winter. I doubt I will freeze or melt. I love walking in the fall but my enthusiasm wanes as it gets darker and colder. Kathryn and I made a pact so I'm optimistic.

The coneflowers have started blooming and they'll continue through early fall. I think I saw some white ones again. Also white phlox. And the false sunflowers that I thought had disappeared are back in full force. I love that about gardening. It's like magic.

Two months ago I promised myself that I would go to the gym three times every week. Gunnar wrote up weight programs for me to do on the days I am not training with him so I have some structure. There was only one week when I didn't make it three times and I was out of town for three days that week. Yay me.

I've used blogger by Google for ten years and mostly I love it. It's easy to use and I rarely have problems. This alignment thing it's doing right now makes me crazy so I have decided to ignore it. Like the dishes in the sink.

Sunday, April 09, 2017

some dog

This is our big Golden Doodle, Gus. There is nothing he likes better than a walk in a place where he can be off the leash to run and chase sticks or his ball. He's good about sticking close to Regis and coming back when he's called.

Gus and Regis went for a walk by the hospital the other evening. It was getting dark and cool so Regis was surprised to see a gentleman standing out in a field, hands in pockets. Assuming he was a bird watcher, Regis was ready to move on...but not Gus. Gus ran out into the field and made a few circles around the man, ignoring Regis's calls to return. He sat down in front of the man and watched his face. Regis finally trudged out to see why Gus was ignoring him.

The man said he had gone out for a walk but was lost. He admitted to not knowing where he was and he couldn't name the place where he lived. Regis suggested that he and Gus would take him in the truck and find his home.

When they got to the truck, Regis named a few of the assisted living facilities in the neighborhood and the man recognized the name. Mystery solved. They drove him home and made sure he was safely inside.

This is not the first time Gus has rescued someone. Regis and I joke that he's like Lassie. Another time, same vicinity, Gus took off, refused to return. When we turned the corner, ready to scold him, he was with an elderly couple. The man had fallen to one knee and his wife, a tiny woman, didn't have the strength to help him stand. We got him up and walked them back to their residence.

Gus to the rescue.